Dwarf doctor (Swiss Press Text 2014, by Rolf Neeser) - Swiss Press Award

Le matin

Rolf Neeser

Max Schott from Madrets cultivates a unique hobby in the field of healthcare... The nanologist, who died in 2012 at the biblical age of 97, fought doggedly against the abuse of garden gnomes through violence, mistreatment, theft, and pulverization, as well as against female garden gnomes and slander. Friedmann's association is supported by the French Front de Liberation des Nains de Jardin, which liberates the gnomes from front gardens and releases them into the wild. In left-wing circles, the garden gnome (cost today: around 50 francs) has been considered the epitome of philistinism since 1968 at the latest. There are also parodies: Helmut Kohl as a treetop man, garden gnomes with a knife in their backs or with their pants down. Such things, however, have so far steered clear of Schott's clinic, even though his wife longs for naughty ones. Without end. Garden Gnome Doctor Schott grew up in the working-class neighborhood of Möösli; there was a gnome in every garden, and even then, little Max mended them. Later, when he worked as a baggage checker at Swissair, as a caretaker at Swisscom, and as a car attendant at the Biel public transport company, he forgot about the gnomes until his wife, after their retirement, suggested he return to his old hobby. They placed an ad, and off they went. And there's no end in sight. In Germany alone, there are 30 million gnomes, and around 100 million worldwide. And since there are also 3 million in Switzerland, the garden gnome doctor from Madretsch will probably never run out of work...